7 Money Moves Guys Can Take To Impress Women

As a financial advisor, I get to observe the money mistakes guys make in their relationships. Frivolous spending, excessive debt, and not having a financial plan can become significant stressors in a relationship, leading to arguments over money and even divorce.

If you’re loosely spending money while your partner is doing everything they can to save a buck, there’s bound to be friction in your relationship. When it comes to your finances, guys, women aren’t that complicated. They don’t need partners who invest all their energy in trying to prove themselves.1

I’m sure women desire a partner that’s a good friend makes them laugh, makes them feel financially secure, and is predictable with their money. In other words, she needs her man to be financially responsible and stable.

7 Money Moves Guys Can Take

7 Money Moves Guys Can Take To
Impress Women

As a financial advisor and have been married for almost 20 years, I know how important balance is to a woman. And, I know how having confidence in your financial plan can enhance that balance.

Here are some excellent money moves you can take today that can  impress your partner and avoid having her running for the hills:

  1. Show Financial Responsibility
  2. Exude Financial Confidence
  3. Live Below Your Means
  4. Own Assets, Not Liabilities
  5. Be Generous
  6. Plan For the Future
  7. Protect Your Wealth

Tip #1: Show Financial Responsibility

“When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me.” – 1 Corinthians 13:11

I’ve probably heard this verse over 500 times from weddings that I’ve attended but never thought about its meaning in the context of money. I’m betting you haven’t either, but there is some great wisdom in it, so pay attention.

When we’re young, we use money selfishly. We’re irresponsible with it and spend it foolishly without thought of how our choices affect our relationships, businesses, and or our future. I’ve been there, too. And it took me almost losing my first business to realize what I was doing.

The exact message behind this biblical verse is that love never fails, so don’t fail the woman you love. Stop spending your money on toys, at least until you’re well on your way to creating wealth for your household.

Regardless of how good of a living you’re making for yourself, stop spending money like a child. Impress your woman by showing her you’re responsible with your money.

If you're loosely spending money while your partner is doing everything they can to save a buck, there's bound to be friction in your relationship.

#2: Exude Financial Confidence

Being financially responsible will give you financial confidence, which you can’t have if you’re living paycheck to paycheck. While you can argue that you work hard for your money and deserve to spend it, marriage is not a partnership. 

Only in divorce does a marriage become a business transaction. In a marriage, you are one of a whole; your income is both of your income. And your bank accounts are both of your bank accounts. 

As a financial advisor, I get to see what financial confidence looks like from my more successful clients, and it is one of the most important tools a man can own. It’s compelling.

When you exude confidence around your finances, you show strength and self-assurance. You start to believe in yourself and act in a way that follows through on decisions. Financial confidence gives you the intention and willpower to take control of your money. 

To boost your financial confidence, follow these simple tips:

  1. Create financial goals and commit to achieving them
  2. Educate yourself about how money works
  3. Build up the courage to take more risks

#3: Live Below Your Means

Nothing will scares your partner faster than living paycheck to paycheck and dedicating all your hard-earned money to monthly payments. That kind of lifestyle isn’t sustainable and leads to arguments over money.

Contrary to that is living below your means. It’s having money left over to save after paying all the bills. Savings can create financial security through an emergency fund, go on debt-free vacations, and save for important financial goals like investing or sending your children to college.

If you want to impress your partner and create a lasting relationship, provide them financial stability and security. Show her that you are trustworthy with your money, and take it a step further —invite her in on your plans by scheduling Money Dates. You might be surprised to find out that she has goals of her own.

One lesson that life has taught me is couples that plan together, tend to grow together. And the ones that don’t tend to experience pain and grow apart.

Women have to deal with the inner dialogues of insecurities and worries. Show her that you’re invested in this relationship, literally and figuratively.

How you do that is by purchasing assets, not liabilities.

#4: Own Assets, Not Liabilities

Most people would define an asset to be a property of value, and a liability to be a debt. For example, they would consider a home to be an asset, but the mortgage liability.

I don’t believe that to be true. In the wake of the 2009 credit crisis, I now realize that an asset is something much more. To me, an asset is something that makes me money, while a liability is something that costs me money.

To me, a home (the real estate property that you live in) is not truly an asset; it’s a liability. Even without a mortgage, a house costs money year after year in maintenance, taxes, insurance, and in opportunity cost.

While you can build equity in a home, my experience as a financial advisor has shown me that too many people enter retirement still owing huge mortgage balances, despite living in them for a lifetime. How is that possible?

It’s easy when people purchase liabilities and resort to debt to fix their problems. It’s a vicious cycle of making monthly payments, maxing out credit cards, and refinancing the equity out of their homes to pay off their debts.

In short, some people use the equity in their home like a piggy bank.

If you want to impress your woman, educate yourself as to what’s truly an asset and what’s a liability or has liabilities attached. Then spend your life’s energy focusing on income-generating assets and avoiding unnecessary liabilities.

In my years as a financial advisor, here’s what I learned from the rich. They use their income and buy assets. They live below their means, avoiding lavish homes, car payments, and debt.

Meanwhile, the middle-class person often takes their extra income and purchases liabilities. In doing so, they commit all their income to monthly payments and a lifestyle of living paycheck to paycheck.

#5: Be Generous

Someone once told me, “The way you show someone you care is by giving your time.”

It didn’t mean as much to me then as it does today, but they were right. Time is our most valuable asset.

According to Terri Orbuch, Ph.D., a relationship therapist and professor, generosity may be what matters most in a marriage. According to her articles, generosity leads to happiness in relationships.

The simple act of making your partner feel valued, noticed, appreciated, respected, loved, and desired makes a relationship thrive. Nothing shows you care more than being generous with your time and being present in the moment.

I often share outcomes of my Money Dates because I believe they are crucial to planning and growing with your partner. They can make marital finance fun —I know I look forward to ours —but don’t stop there.

When was the last time that you took your girl out on a date? In long-term relationships, date nights can fade away. Ignite that spark by taking your partner out for a date night. Remind yourselves why you fell in love in the first place.

I recommend keeping date nights engaging and exciting, as opposed to a movie night or dinner. Remember to factor these into your budget so that you can do them regularly. Try to schedule a date night every 30 to 90 days.

#6: Plan For The Future

Admittedly, I probably wouldn’t be as good of a planner if I didn’t learn a thing or two from my wife. We genuinely complement each other.

My wife loves it when we plan together because we accomplish so much. Whether it’s reviewing our financial goals for the year or yard work, she loves creating checklists and staying on top of things.

I can’t express how much satisfaction she gets in crossing things off that list.

My strength lies in strategy and efficiency. I’m very good at breaking down complex projects into smaller, achievable goals. For example, I can create a savings goal and break it down into monthly goals with weekly tasks, which would create a series of smaller wins along that way.

As a result, optimism rises as success seems more likely. That level of confidence in your finances creates excitement, and women love that. When it comes to the future, a lot of women are terrified of it; a lot of men are too. The trick is finding a way to get past your weaknesses and insecurities.

Thankfully, most of us have a partner that makes up for what we’re lacking. If I’m strong in strategy, my wife is strong in execution. This symbiotic relationship encourages progression, and that’s how we achieve so much.

If personal finance is challenging for both you and your partner, you might want to speak with a financial advisor . I know the couples that I work with value my advice, especially when I bring up financial matters they haven’t thought about yet.

#7: Protect Your Wealth

I genuinely wish that money didn’t hold the social importance that it does. However, the fact of the matter is, you can’t live comfortably in today’s world without creating financial security for yourself.

I see far too many people work far too hard, for far too long with very little to show for it. They work their entire lives doing the right things: working hard, paying their taxes, and investing for retirement, only to find that a single life event erased it all.

That’s how fragile wealth can be.

A good financial plan will incorporate both offensive and defensive strategies. Saving, investing, and earning more are excellent offensive strategies. But, without a proper defensive strategy in place, the wealth you’ll work your entire life to build will quickly evaporate.

My father worked his entire life but only focused on offensive strategies. Just five years from retirement, he lost his job due to the 2008 financial crisis, which wiped more than half of his retirement savings.

Because he didn’t have proper defensive strategies in place, he wasn’t afforded time for his retirement nest egg to recover. Instead, he had to liquidate his retirement savings to save his home — which is proof to me that a home is, in fact, a liability — with his only source of income being social security.

Investors now expect their wealth managers to handle their defensive strategies much more effectively. You should, too.

Key takeaways

Divorces are expensive, and one of the top reasons for them are money fights. If you follow these seven money moves, I’m confident you will have a better chance of creating lasting wealth for your family.

Let’s recap:

  • Show Financial Responsibility. Women like predictability, and to get that within your finances, you need to pay attention to the numbers.
  • Exude Financial Confidence. Women desire balance, and having confidence in your financial plan will enhance that balance. Confident people make many different choices than those who are fearful.
  • Live Below Your Means. You can’t hope to save money if you’re living paycheck to paycheck.
  • Own Assets, Not Liabilities. Assets make you money. Liabilities cost you money. Purchase assets and say no to bad debt.
  • Be Generous. You show someone you care by giving them your time. Be generous with yours; generosity creates happiness.
  • Plan For the Future. Plan for the future together. Hopefully, you and your partner complement each other.
  • Protect Your Wealth. Only playing offense will cause you to lose the game. You need to have defensive strategies in place to manage risk more effectively.

Sources:

1) 15 Things Women Need From the Men in Their Lives, Psychology Today —
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/lifetime-connections/201806/15-things-women-want-the-men-in-their-lives

For Educational Purposes Only – Not to be relied upon as financial, tax, or legal advice.  The views expressed are those of the author/presenter and do not necessarily reflect those of HTK and its affiliates;  all data is derived from sources believed to be reliable.

3077678RB_Jun22

3 Money Buckets that Help to Build Wealth

Disclosure: For Educational Purposes Only – Not to be relied upon as financial advice.  The views expressed are those of the author/presenter, and data is derived from sources believed to be accurate.

3 Money Buckets that Help to Build Wealth

 

In 2010, Allstate Insurance Company launched its “Mayhem” video campaign. Dean Winters, who performed magnificently as Mayhem, gave viewers a play-by-play to the devastation he was creating. The videos were both devastating and comical, making an impact across America.

While the Mayhem videos are entertaining, they also teach us what life can feel like without having appropriate safety nets in place. To help avoid “mayhem” in your own life, let’s review what I call the 3 Money Buckets that Help To Build Wealth.

While these accounts aren’t going to make you wealthy per se, they do help you keep the Wealth you’ve created for yourself in times of hardship and economic downturn.

Without further ado, here are the 3 Money Buckets that Help to Build Wealth.

Money Bucket #1: Your Emergency Fund

In movies, there’s often a burning building. People, fearful for their lives, jump from the burning building to safety. Are they crazy for jumping? No, they see the inflatable jump cushion in the streets below and jump, knowing the air cushion will absorb the impact of their fall.

Unfortunately, the hero of the story doesn’t get such a cushion. By the time he or she helps everyone escape, the fire gets out of control. The hero has to jump to the adjacent building, hoping to grab hold of the emergency stairwell.

In many situations, the hero either gets lucky or tumbles painfully to the streets below into a dumpster. Either way, they get seriously banged up.

With your finances, an emergency fund works much like that inflatable jump cushion. Its job is to break a financial fall. Without it, people are like the hero, tumbling to the streets below, banged up and broken.

Without an emergency fund, people resort to debt and borrow from their retirement accounts.

Dave Ramsey, an American author and radio show host suggests building a minimum of $1,000 in your Emergency Fund. From there, you’re supposed to start tackling your debt.

As someone who has built and used his emergency fund, I can attest that this practice has helped me through several tight spots. I’ve been able to pay unexpected bills, fix my car, replace a water heater, and repair a leaky roof without having to take out debt or borrow money from friends and family.

But, before we build our emergency fund, we need to lay some ground rules for this money. Let’s define what an emergency is and what it’s not.

Here are my rules for using money in your emergency fund:

  1. Your Emergency Fund is for actual emergencies only. I define a financial emergency as an event that would prohibit you from working, create unsafe living conditions, or is simply unpredictable and has a cost.

Not having enough money to go on a last-minute trip with your friends is not an emergency. Being short on cash for the holidays is not an emergency. But needing money to purchase a flight to attend a loved one’s funeral is an emergency.

  1. Your emergency fund is not a backup account; it’s your lifeline. If you routinely borrow money from this account for non-emergent things, you won’t be ready for a real emergency.

For this reason, I recommend online banking for your three money buckets. Transferring money out of online banks typically takes a couple of days, which affords you some time to think things through.

However, in real emergencies, which should rarely happen, the money is there for you. And once you use it, your priority will be to bring this account back up to $1,000.

There are 3 Money Buckets Required to Build Wealth. They are your Emergency Fund, Vacation Fund, and Short-term Goals Fund

Money Bucket #2: Your Vacation Fund

Once your Emergency Fund reaches your minimum level of a thousand dollars, you can start directing money to a Vacation Fund.

I save for vacations a little differently than most people that I know. I use a cash envelope budget to pay for vacations and traveling. My wife and I are both self-employed, and our incomes can vary.

In financially challenging years, we want peace of mind knowing that we can still get away. And in financially successful years, we might wish to get away several times. In those situations, we have a cash envelope budget for each trip.

No matter what happens, I know that I have that vacation prepaid by using my cash envelope. It also includes all designated spending money so it’s impossible to overspend.

Whatever your method, I recommend a starting budget of saving $40 a week or $75 bi-weekly. Schedule an automatic transfer out of your checking account to the bank account that you’ve designated as your Vacation Fund. In twelve months, you can have close to $2,000 saved. If that’s not enough, make adjustments to meet your needs.

You can use your Vacation Fund for one big trip or several weekend getaways. I recommend getting away every 90 days, whether it’s a staycation or somewhere within driving distance.

Money Bucket #3: Your Short-Term Goals Fund

After you have a thousand dollars in your emergency fund and started automated transfers to your vacation fund, it’s time to work on your short term goals fund.

A short term goals fund makes sure that you have money for more capital purchases that you’ll need to make in the next 5-7 years.

For example, I tend to get a new car every 5-7 years, as I’m sure most people do. But the average car payment in America for 2019 was $554 for a new vehicle and $391 for a used one.1

That’s a lot of money coming out of your paycheck. But if you had a down payment saved in a Short Term Goals Fund and were able to trade in your old car, your monthly payments could be much lower. A lower monthly payment means more freedom for you when making other financial decisions. You could continue to save and pay down debt instead of having a high car payment.

Another use for this account would be to save for a down payment on a home. If you need this money in just a few years, it may be smarter to keep the money in cash so that you don’t have to worry about market fluctuations.

Conclusion

I hope that you found this to be a new perspective on creating security and confidence with your money. I have found that having these 3 Money Buckets: Emergency Fund, Vacation Fund, and Short Term Goals Fund to help in surviving unforeseen financial complications, go on debt-free vacations, and to have money set aside for future opportunities.

Key takeaways

You can’t hope to build wealth if you don’t have the appropriate safety nets in place. Without an emergency fund, you may have to resort to debt to pay for unexpected bills, be forced to liquidate the savings you’ve worked so hard to build, or even rob your own retirement.

  • Your vacation fund can allow you to go on debt-free vacations, allowing for a truly relaxing trip. It’s hard to relax if you use credit cards to pay for these trips, because we all think about all the extra hours we have to work. Personally, I’d much rather pay cash for vacation and invest my tax refund.
  • The life you want isn’t made with magic, it’s made with money. Your 5-Year Goals fund is a great spot to save money that you need in the short term. It can be used as a down payment on your next apartment, a home, or that car you’ll need in just a few short years.
  • Creating sinking funds, like these core money buckets, will allow you to design the life you truly want to live, enabling you to pay yourself first.

How to Start an Emergency Fund

Disclosure: For Educational Purposes Only – Not to be relied upon as financial advice.  The views expressed are those of the author/presenter, and data is derived from sources believed to be accurate.

How to Start an Emergency Fund

I truly wish that money didn’t hold the social importance that it does. However, the inescapable fact of the matter is that, in order to live comfortably in today’s fast changing world, each of us needs some level of financial security.

As a financial advisor, I see far too many people work far too hard, for far too long with little-to-nothing to show for it all. For the majority of people, all they have to show for all their years of hard work are the things they’ve purchased for themselves over the years.

In fact, the 2016 U.S. Census Bureau reports that the median household net worth for homeowners age 65 and older is only $209,300. If you removed their house from the figure, it would only be $64,370.1

The median best represents the middle point, where half of the households have more and half of the households have less. In a mathematical average, your top one percenters in the country would greatly skew the numbers.

I consider an emergency fund to be one of the three money buckets required to build wealth. [deep link to post] To me, wealth is more of a number than a dollar figure. That number represents the number of months that I can live without having to work a job. 

Unfortunately, you can’t build wealth for yourself if your solution to financial problems is to resort to debt and liquidate the investments that you’ve worked years to build. So to help you change this dangerous mindset, I want to share this Emergency Fund Guide for Beginners.

Let’s begin.

What’s an emergency fund?

An emergency fund is a bank account earmarked to cover larger, unexpected expenses that you can’t pay for with your income. The keyword here is “unexpected.”

Here are some examples of how people use money in their emergency fund:

  • Loss of income
  • Car repairs prohibiting from commuting to work.
  • Expenses related to the death or illness of a loved one (e.g. flights, hotel, etc.)
  • Events leading to unsafe living conditions (e.g. water heater, leaking roof, etc.)
  • Repair or replacement of a broken appliance (e.g. refrigerator, washer/dryer, microwave)
  • Any unexpected bill that can’t be paid through your cash flow (e.g. IRS bill, medical bills).

There are a lot of situations where you should use an emergency fund and they can’t all be listed here. Just remember that it’s for an emergency and a last resort.

Here are some examples of non-emergencies:

  • Not having enough money for the holidays
  • Unexpected invitation to go on vacation with friends or family
  • Losing your job and not having enough money to buy non-essential items (e.g. nothing related to groceries, utilities, shelter, or transportation to work)
  • Purchases where you’ll put the money back next paycheck.

It’s crucial to not use or borrow money from your emergency fund for things that are not an emergency. I promise you that an expected bill or collections notice will show up in the mail right after using your emergency fund for something dumb. I’ve seen it happen too often and it’s even happened to me, of all people.

how to start an emergency fund

Who needs an emergency fund?

I’d like to believe that we all need an emergency fund, regardless how much income we make. Emergency funds create a cash cushion that can help us through tough times, without having to always resort to debt to fix our financial problems. 

If you look at what has happened across the United States with the Coronavirus (COVID-19), the virus has crippled our economy. Millions of people lost their jobs, incurred medical bills, or at the very least experienced a reduction in their income. 

Thankfully the government intervened, providing stimulus checks and small business loans to make sure that employees keep their paycheck. But what if this only happened to your family? How long would you survive without income and where would the money come from? 

You can’t rely on the government to bail you out. 

If ever faced with a #moneyproblem, talk things out with your partner. Solve it (and grow) together.

How much should I have in my emergency fund?

Short answer: You need a minimum of $1,000 in a starter emergency fund.

When you’re just starting out with building an emergency fund, your first goal should be to save $1,000 as fast as you can. If the account drops below that amount (because you had an emergency recently), you need to build it back up to that minimum level —fast!

Is $1,000 enough? The simple answer is no.

You eventually need to build this account up enough to cover 3-6 months worth of expenses, and that takes time. The importance of having a thousand dollars in this account is more for psychological reasons, but it helps you avoid more debt.

If you look at how the government approaches budgets, it’s a “use it all or lose it next round” system. In other words, people are punished if they’re fiscally responsible. They won’t get more money next round, if they don’t use it all.

Because of that, we’re trained as consumers to spend all of our money. Naturally, when a problem arises, we resort to debt to cover the shortfall or tap into our retirement accounts. Coincidentally, the government does the same thing.

Currently the U.S. national debt is almost $24.5 trillion dollars and our government is dipping into federal retiree programs to help fund operations. The government is in debt and it’s tapping into retirement money.2

Having a thousand dollars in an emergency fund changes the way you handle financial problems. You start to think differently about your money when you give each dollar a job. The goal is simply to avoid debt as a first resort.

Debt is a thief and it will steal all your hopes and dreams. The more monthly payments you have to make, the less of your paycheck you get to keep.

Is an emergency fund a bank account?

An emergency fund is a bank account, but earmarked for emergencies. Because an emergency fund is critically important to avoiding debt, I don’t recommend keeping yours at the bank that you pay bills out of. 

I’m a spender, so what works for me is an “out of sight, out of mind” approach. I like to know that the money is there if I ever need it, but don’t want to see the balance every day. And for that reason, I keep my emergency fund, as well as my other sinking funds, at an online bank. 

I do this for a couple of reasons. First, if an emergency were really to happen, the money can be wired to my bank account within a couple of days. And second, this affords me time to process the situation, and do some critical thinking.

My wife and I have been in a number of situations that felt like an emergency. Thankfully, we have an amazing relationship and schedule Money Dates to talk things out. But most of the time we come up with a solution that doesn’t involve our emergency fund. We have several sinking funds like our vacation fund, 5-Year Goals fund, kids activities, even a boat fund. We can borrow between each of the accounts before ever needing money from an emergency fund. 

I’ll be honest. I have a boat fund and it’s a bad financial decision to get a boat. Sure, if I have the money to make those kinds of decisions, then great. But for now, if I have an emergency that’s the first thing that’s gonna go.  

If you’re ever faced with an emergency, talk things out with your partner and make financial decisions together. Even if you made the wrong choice, at least you both get to learn from it. And that lesson is worth some money. 

And just know, real emergencies rarely ever need to be resolved on the spot. They can wait a couple of days.

How to start an emergency fund

Okay, you want to start an emergency fund, where do you start?

First, choose a bank or credit union that’s separate from the one that you pay bills out of. As I mentioned earlier, I recommend online banks that have no minimums and no monthly fees. They typically offer exponentially higher interest rates on savings and money market accounts, with some even offering interest on checking accounts!

If you already have an emergency fund at a local bank, I leave it up to you to decide if you want to keep it there or move it online. In either situation, cut up any debit cards that you receive. You want to add extra steps, even days, to afford you time for critical thinking about your emergency.

Next, you need to fund your emergency fund. Because, what good is an emergency fund with no money in it? Your goal is to save up $1,000 as fast as possible, and that will require a radically different mindset than you have today.

If you wait until the end of the month, you’ll always find there’s nothing to save. That’s because you have this mindset of paying other people first. Instead, I challenge you to flip that around and pay yourself first.

Paying yourself first is where you take a portion of your paycheck and add it to your emergency fund before paying any bills. It’s the practice required not only to build your emergency fund, but also to build wealth. But it does take some budgeting.

If you need help finding some money, I created a 30-Day Money Finder Challenge that’s helped hundreds of people build their emergency fund, as well as improve their personal finances.

You’ll get 30 days worth of financial tasks, dripped to you daily via email. Most tasks only require as little as 15 minutes, with the average person saving $500 by the end of the challenge. That’s half of your emergency fund minimum.

30-Day Money Finder Challenge

    We respect your privacy. Unsubscribe at anytime.
    Powered By ConvertKit

    Key takeaways

    • An emergency fund will help break a financial fall due to an emergency. We all need one or else we’ll always resort to debt to fix our financial challenges in life, and that won’t help you to build wealth. Debt is a thief that robs you of all your hopes and dreams.
    • A starter emergency fund needs to have a minimum of $1,000 in it. If you need to use some of it for emergencies, don’t feel bad. That’s what it’s there for. But you need to make bringing this account back up to $1,000 a priority. 
    • An emergency fund is a savings account, preferably at an online bank or credit union. Online banks tend to offer higher interest than local brick and mortar banks. Also, they don’t usually have debit cards and take a couple of days to wire the money. This affords you time for critical thinking, allowing you not to respond emotionally. 
    • To fund an emergency fund (and keep the money in there), you’re going to have to think radically different than you do today. You’re going to need to pay yourself first, which will require you to do some budgeting. 
    • You have a friend to help —me. I have created tools and resources designed to help, like my 30-Day Money Finder Challenge. If you want to chat, connect with me on Facebook or Linkedin.

    Sources:

    1) Wealth, Asset Ownership, & Debt of Households Detailed Tables: 2016, U.S. Census Bureau — https://www.census.gov/data/tables/2016/demo/wealth/wealth-asset-ownership.html

    2) U.S. Department of the Treasury, Bureau of the Fiscal Service — https://www.treasurydirect.gov/NP/debt/current

     

    3060087RB_May22